Some people think that ego is simply a person’s pride, which is partly true. For instance, some men may have an ego based on money, physical appearance, or the belief that they are the most handsome. Women may have an ego based on charm, thinking that they are exceptionally beautiful. This type of ego can become a barrier to personal growth. For example, imagine someone who believes he is already the best scientist and knows everything about science. Because of this ego, he may stop learning and miss out on acquiring advanced knowledge and new technologies, ultimately hindering his growth.
In this case, the person’s ego is harmful, acting as an obstacle to progress. However, having a healthy ego can actually contribute to success. For example, you may have heard of Yuvraj Singh, who, when his ego was challenged, responded by hitting six sixes in an over. Similarly, a farmer who was told he couldn't achieve success eventually built the Lamborghini company. These examples show that a positive ego can drive people to improve themselves rather than fighting with others or blaming those who hurt their ego. Psychology suggests that ego represents our identity and character, which is also true.
Ego shapes our overall behavior, speaking style, maturity, and mindset. However, many people believe that having an ego is always bad. This is why it’s crucial to understand ego properly and to develop a healthy one. A bad ego can ruin your life, making you unsuccessful, undisciplined, and constantly in conflict. For example, if someone insults you and your immediate reaction is to fight back just to prove yourself, that’s a bad ego. You end up wasting your time and energy. In contrast, take the example of Yuvraj Singh, the cricketer. When his ego was challenged, he responded not with anger but by hitting six sixes in an over. That’s an example of a healthy or positive ego.
To achieve success, we need an ego like Yuvraj Singh’s or the determined mindset of hardworking individuals. Developing this kind of healthy ego requires a true understanding of what ego means. Successful people cultivate an ego that drives them forward, pushing them to overcome challenges and grow. On the other hand, unsuccessful people often have a negative ego—constantly comparing themselves to others, resenting others’ success, and thinking everyone should be the same regardless of effort. To avoid these traps, it’s essential to understand ego deeply.
How can we build a healthy ego?
When Yuvaraj Singh’s ego was challenged, he responded not with anger, but with excellence—hitting six sixes in a single over. This shows a powerful lesson: when someone hurts our ego with words or actions, we should channel that energy into our work and prove ourselves through results, not conflict. Instead of fighting back, let your success speak.
A healthy ego doesn't thrive on comparison. While a little comparison can motivate, constant comparison is harmful. When someone becomes successful, we shouldn't feel jealous or question their success. Instead, we should study their path and learn from it. Believe that those who work hard achieve success—whether it’s wealth, fame, or personal growth. Everyone is different, and not all journeys are the same.
Most successful people have a balanced ego. They are often humble and grounded, even though they are not perfect—no one is. Yes, some exceptions exist—people with toxic egos—but we can choose not to follow them.
We should also avoid shows or media that glorify conflict and violence, such as Bigg Boss or Roadies. These may harm our mindset and ego over time. Focus instead on content that builds peace, confidence, and self-growth.
I follow successful people who have a strong but balanced ego. I learn from them and try to apply those lessons in my life. I also read self-help books, watch YouTube videos, and listen to podcasts that help me understand ego better. When someone hurts my ego by saying bad things or trying to put me down, I remind myself to respond with actions, not arguments. I believe in replying with my work, not with words or fights. Instead of comparing myself with others, I focus on becoming 1% better every day. For example, if someone gets good marks or delivers a great presentation in college, I try to learn from them instead of feeling jealous. But I’ve also noticed that some people, including friends, become negative when others succeed. Once, when I scored well in a presentation, a few classmates tried to pull me down by saying my topic was easy. They do this to others too, saying things like "he has a setting with the professor." Over time, I’ve learned to distance myself from such people. I believe everyone gets success based on their hard work, but the level of success may not be the same for everyone—and that’s okay.
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